By André Charitat, Chattanooga, TN—A North Shore icon, Julie Darling’s has been providing Chattanooga with delicious doughnuts for as long as I can remember.
The travesty, however, was that I have never graced my palate with one of their infamous doughnuts!
But, readers, today was the day.
What I wasn’t suspecting when I walked into Julie Darling’s was something called the “doughnut sundae.”
I knew immediately that this is what I was going to try. I mean really, who could pass up something called a doughnut sundae?
When I ordered said sundae full of promises of deliciousness and caloric intake, I assumed that I would get the standard glazed doughnut (which underwhelms me to be honest) with a dab of ice cream on top.
The person behind the counter, who I fondly referred to in my mind as the Doughnut Whisperer, asked me what type of sundae I wanted.
Being the Julie Darling’s newbie that I was, I exclaimed vehemently “vanilla!” He rolled his eyes and asked me what type of doughnut I wanted. My eyes widened in excitement, I felt like a kid in a candy store!
Any doughnut I wanted topped with some ice cream; pinch me I’m dreaming I thought. The decision process that ensued took a good five minutes, but I settled on a frosted doughnut with sprinkles.
I turn around for a minute and the man hands me a giant dish of vanilla ice cream. Again, being ignorant of the Julie Darling way, I expected him to hand me my doughnut of choice on the side, and I got sad. But then I realized, underneath that mass of ice cream was my doughnut crying for help!
Quickly I decided that it was time to unbury my fried friend from this mountain of vanilla ice cream and I gladly set to work.
You know what they say, a moment on the lips, a lifetime of sorrow, loneliness, and feline companionship. I mean, a lifetime on the hips. But let me tell you readers (Mom, et al.) that moment on my lips was well worth the lifelong repercussions, and the two hours I spent on the elliptical crying afterwards.
The doughnut was absolutely delicious. As I type this article I am trying to put myself in a social situation where buying a dozen doughnuts would be OK, but unfortunately the only realization I had is that I have no social life and not enough friends to warrant said purchase.
But anyway, the prices at Julie Darling’s were very reasonable, the doughnuts were to die for, and the location is spectacular. It is just across the walking bridge on the North Shore, an easy walk for those of you on campus.
Now go put down this paper, run to Julie Darling’s, get a doughnut sundae and fill that void that your ex left behind! I know I did!